I haven’t done anything creative in a looong time. From websites, to drawing, to crafty things. Nothing. All I’ve done is work, play with Lily, and clean the house. Boy oh boy. Heh. I haven’t even blogged. I remember a long time ago, when I was so excited about buying new custom rubber stamps for my craft projects, and how I would spend hours just playing with these things, making things up, creating handmade cards and photos and pictures. Playing with ribbons. Now, I don’t even know where those things are in the house! I need to make some “me time” soon. But oh, the “me time” has been indoctrinated by an adorable little daughter of mine.

There have been so many things to be grateful for, that I am beside myself on what to write about. As always, I am amazed at how fast our little baby girl is growing. Before we know it, she’ll be a whole year old. I remember the day we found out we were pregnant, and I remember the whole pregnancy as if it was just yesterday. And now my baby girl is already 10 months old. I am so grateful for her presence, her existence, her beauty, her charm, her entire being. I am so grateful to be a mother. It’s the best feeling in the world, to be filled with all this love bubbling inside me.

Sometimes I just watch her go go go and I think, “Wow, what did I do before her? What did we do before her?” I can’t believe we went almost 10 years, just the two of us, me and my husband, without our Lily in our lives. Wow. Now we can’t imagine life without her.

(Do you need some Decaslim reviews?)

Ah, finally it is only 9p and I don’t feel like I’m rushing to get things done around the house so I can have some bit of time to myself before I have to go to bed. I go to bed pretty early these days because little miss Lily Bean sometimes wakes up in the middle of the night for a binky emergency or a feeding or whatever-it-is that she needs. During the week, Dave gets up with her, but over the weekend, I have most of that responsibility, so I have to get lots of rest — as much as I can, in case she gets up and stays up.

I got the whole house cleaned up today. Vacuumed two rooms (the living room and Lily’s room, which are the two rooms in the house with the most traffic for Lily), and did around 3 loads of laundry. Cleaned the kitchen for the most part, and even re-arranged her furniture. I still have more to do, but it can’t all be done while she is sleeping because most of it I need to be in her room in order to complete it (like organize her closet space). So right now, I have a bit of time for myself. I don’t want to think about chores, such as whipping out our carpet steam cleaner to clean our floors, or cleaning the kitchen, or organizing the bedroom space, etc. I just want to maybe draw a little, write a little, read a little, and then hop into bed. That’s my visualization for the night.

I haven’t done a gratitude list in a long time, and it’s about time I do one, don’t you think? As part of this site’s policy, I want to recognize all the good things in my life, and visualize all the beautiful things to come. All positive energy, no negative energy. I want to keep it that way. Today’s general gratitude is for my loving husband.

You see, Dave and I have been best friends for approximately 12 years. We’ve been together for 10 of those years. We’ve been married for almost 2 of those years. It’s been a really awesome journey — hardly any fights or arguments (some disagreements, of course), and always respect and communication. Our “status” in our family have always been ongoing and transient, but what always remains consistent is our love for each other and our dedication to each other. We went from best friends to lovers to roommates to engaged couple to married couple to mommy and daddy. All in the span of 12 years. Now, I’m a working mommy and he’s a stay-at-home daddy. While he could have argued to apply for jobs in IT, he didn’t, because he wanted to stay home with our baby because I had to work. I totally appreciate and am grateful for this role he is so willing to play. He’s a great daddy to our Lily Bean, and I’m grateful that he is so wonderful with her, able to pick up the responsibility where many men fall short at. He willingly takes care of her, and willingly dedicates his whole days to her. I always knew I could trust him, but I didn’t realize the extent of my love for him and my trust in him until I saw him become a father to our baby girl. He’s been there since day one. He’s been loving, kind, present since day one. He’s been a loving, doting father since day one. Since we found out we were pregnant. He talked to the belly, he held her on the day she was born, he took care of her and woke up with her in the middle of the night when I couldn’t. I couldn’t have chosen a better father for my daughter. He is seriously our gift from the universe.

When was it that my current life hit me like a ton of bricks? When was my moment of “Ah-HA!!” When was my enlightened period? When was it that I realized what would make me live, what would enable me to die, what would let me keep moving? I think it was when I was found out that I loved getting up in the morning. To start a fresh day, the world as my oyster, inside it are pearls that only I can access. I think it was when one morning, I woke up and realized, “Wow. I’m in LOVE!” And then suddenly, all the pieces started falling together. Easily, fitfully, like they were always meant to be there.

Life is so simple these days. There is a tendency in my head that when life becomes simple, I stop thinking. I just move along because it’s so easy, so effortless. I just “be” and I just “know.” I just “am.” There isn’t a bone in my body that has to second guess who I am, there isn’t a muscle in my body that moves involuntarily without the rest of my body following. I just “be” whatever I am. I think that is when my blogging world takes the back seat. I think that is when I stop writing. As happy as I am, I stop thinking because there really isn’t anything to “think” about. When the mind stops moving because there isn’t anything to wonder about. It’s *that* easy to live these days. My mind has taken a trip, and it didn’t even need luggage.

There are so many things to be grateful for these days. I keep forgetting to update this site. Or, more likely, I don’t have as much time anymore to update this site. Lily is growing more and more everyday, and I find my days wrapped around her like white is wrapped around rice. I am so fascinated with this little creature that I helped create. Everything about her is a miracle. I am truly blessed.

The biggest thing I am grateful for these days is my family. My Lily Bean, my husband. Just … my family. I have the best family in the world. We fit like a square block fits into a square peg. It’s amazing. I am beyond happy and contented these days. Most of the time, I’m also exhausted beyond belief, and I hardly have any time to catch up on my social life. But regardless, I am so darn happy.

I feel myself changing. Evolving. Moving. I feel her pulling my heart towards her, everywhere she goes. I am so in love with my daughter. And she’ll never need promotional products to win me over.

It’s that time of year again, when I get all curious about real estate. I go searching through Craig’s List for local listings, and sometimes even international listings, such as Wilmington NC real estate. I like to browse, see how much places are going for and stuff. Sometimes I like to daydream about possibly buying one of these homes, of course. That’s the whole fun of it. House window shopping. I think HGTV got me hooked into this mess, badly!