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My Limits

May 30th, 2007 | No Comments | Posted in gratitude

Today was considerably better than yesterday. I’m still feeling a little bummed but after I had my good long cry yesterday (which, wow, felt relieving and I didn’t at all expect it whatsoever.. it was very weird), I felt instantly better and knew my perspective was slightly skewed. I still have some issues to work out and I have to learn how to stick up for myself a little more, I think. I say yes far more often than I say no, and even with clients I want to know I’m there to help them and there to see them through and I’m willing to work for them and with them. But at the end of the day, I just need to know I can’t do everything and I need help with doing some things. I need to ask for help.

I need to know my limits. I am grateful that I am human, that I am a woman, that I am a nurturer. I am grateful that I love first and ask second. I am grateful that Dave loves me. I am grateful that he doesn’t even think twice that I will always be there for him. I am grateful that he has this trust in me and that I have earned it (he’s hard to please when it comes to trust, too). I want to feel a little more appreciated in the things I do, but I am grateful also that I am capable of doing these things.


May 29th, 2007 | 2 Comments | Posted in being

I am tired. I am exhausted. I am overworked and I feel under-appreciated. I feel like people expect me to be Super Helen, and they will settle for nothing less. I feel like the things I do aren’t recognized, and I don’t feel like I’m appreciated. I don’t feel seen today. I am in serious need of some tender loving care.. of someone, anyone, even a perfect stranger, to ask me “How are you, and how can I help you?” I am in the mood to receive today. And I’m not afraid of saying it.

Please give to me. Please.

CD/DVD Printer

May 29th, 2007 | 1 Comment | Posted in encompassed

Hey cool, there’s this new printer out for CDs and DVDs. Dave has always tried to convince me to use my creative measures in different ways; one in particular is through designing DVDs and CDs tops. I haven’t found anything that has made me fall in love with this new technology, but this CD/DVD Printer may be a positive first! It’s a printer dedicated strictly for printing CDs and DVDs. This works best when you’ve got a corporate business and want to make loads of CDs or DVDs to give out or publish for your company. I may be using a CD/DVD Printer when The Lucky Foundation goes full force within the next few years. I’m sure I’ll be able to utilize this creative measure through this printer. I think I’ll also forward this site to Marita and Doris, who are planning to do yoga dvds this summer.

Tuesday Visualizations

May 28th, 2007 | No Comments | Posted in visualization

Welp, here comes another Tuesday tomorrow. It’s another busy day, and on top of that, it’s a HDTV Tuesday. Means I’ll be refreshing PPP over and over again every chance I get. I have a feeling my chances will be slim, but I’ll still try anyway. At any rate, I hope Teesa gets it. :D
So for tomorrow, I’m visualizing this:

- Some positive vibes for Teesa’s special refresh clicking finger.
- Non-cancelled appointments.
- Cat cuddles to start the morning right.
- All of my appointments go well.
- Time for lunch (darn it I forgot to schedule lunch in again).

My Financial Stability

May 28th, 2007 | No Comments | Posted in encompassed

Money is a big issue in this world we live in today. I was talking to Jen (Romita) last night regarding our financial stability and how it affects our sense of growth and groundedness. It’s sad that so many of us feel like we are lost when we can’t seem to find the money ground that would hold us up steady and firm. Too many of us are in debt, hundreds of thousands of dollars. Too many of us struggle on a monthly basis from paycheck to paycheck.

I swore a long time ago that I would not be one of those people who would obsess over money. This has been a difficult life venture because although I won’t accept money as the cause of my happiness, I must also willingly admit eventually that it can be the cause of my unhappiness. Moderation is everything, I suppose. Still, the one thing I have clung onto all these years is that I don’t have any credit debt. Having bad credit debt can haunt you for so long, and it can even go after your children and the things you personally love in your life. I don’t want to be a slave to the money, and one of the ways to prevent that is being credit card debt free.

I suppose, though, being credit card debt free is different than having loans to pay off for a mortgage, or student financial aid. Those I don’t think I can escape. In the near future, when we start looking for a home together, I will have to get educated on what a mortgage is, so that I can be prepared to help Dave make valuable decisions about our first home together. Then hopefully, we can find out more about a mortgage quote, whether it be finding a home in the UK through Nations Finance, or finding a home elsewhere in this world. We’ll need all the help we can get. :)

Air Ambulance

May 28th, 2007 | No Comments | Posted in encompassed

I remember when Larry had his motorcycle accident last August. He was in such pain and the situation was so critical that an air ambulance was called. He was then lifted into an ambulance bed and then lifted into the air to be placed in a helicopter. They flew him to the nearest hospital. It took about 1/3 the time it would’ve taken if they had to drive him in a regular ambulance.

I didn’t even know this type of thing existed until this happened to Larry. I’m grateful that there was an air ambulance to carry Larry safely to the hospital. There was less risk of further damage to his body due to the accident, and because of the critical condition he was in, he needed to be in the hospital for surgery right away. The air ambulance made that possible. Now, with this new technology, it is quickly becoming more of a normality and less of a strange, foreign concept. It makes ambulance help more readily available for people in far-away places, and with this type of help, the air ambulance can reach places from all over the country, from California to New York, in a shorter amount of time. I am so glad when I hear about technology being used to aid more people.

Creating Love

May 28th, 2007 | No Comments | Posted in gratitude

Today is Memorial Day. I had to work in the morning time — had an appointment with a client. When I got back home, I crossed the Canadian-Americna border over here. They had a whole bunch of small white crosses representing a cemetery grave. Each cross stood for a soldier who has died in war in the past. There were a lot.

I can’t believe how many people have risked their lives for our government. I can’t believe how many went to war and died for politics. I just.. I can’t wrap my brain around that. So many deaths. Soldiers and civilians alike.

There was a peace protest against war at this event at the border. There were posters and signs that ask how we are honoring our dead soldiers by going to war again, to create more dead soldiers. There was even a big statue-type thing representing an Iraqi woman holding a bloody child, and the sign next to them said something along the lines of, “Remember Iraqi Deaths Too.”

We can’t just say that war kills our soldiers. We have to also recognize that we are humans of the same family. That family is called Earth. Members of this family die from petty sibling rivalry. It’s unfair, and it no longer makes sense.

Simply because war has existed doesn’t mean it needs to be. Doesn’t make it right. Doesn’t mean we can’t change. We must evolve along with technology. We can’t leave our hearts behind. We can’t let love die. Love must conquer war.

On Memorial Day, remember that there is no need to continue the killing. There is every need in the world to honor those who have lost and who have died by creating love. Big, big love.

I am grateful for all those who sacrificed themselves in times of war who had visions of peace. I am grateful for their lives and their sacrifices because it reminds me just how beautiful peace is. It reminds me we must work for peace.